November 20, 2010
I always feel uneasy about giving my business cards to my friends. About giving my work email address, while I have no idea until when I will be using that address. You can reach me through the address for a while, but I don't own it. No.
Our once-a-year bonus has been postponed for 4 months. And the company only sent us an email, with very very subtle and unclear indication about it. Plus, they did an employees' survey just before the bonus announcement came out.
My evaluation about the company and its policies was on a floodplain even before the announcement. If you had ever looked at my survey score, it was clear that my satisfaction to the team I belong to is fairly high, but my distrust to the company is sky-high. It is not just about the money, it's about other small things, the way they handle things, and about the way they make it clear that they have no interests in investing on us, including giving us decent PCs and infrastructure.
One more thing, and many of us may probably be done with the company.
The point is, the business card of my own. I don't mean to quit my job now or anything, but I am not sure if I want to stay. I think I work hard enough. It is sad that you can't love the place you spend more than 1/3 of your life.
I love my job itself in a way that I have learned a lot and am still learning. But I am not in my 20s anymore, I know that life is about learning, but job is not just about learning. For work, learning should be only a part of it. I want to take a break from learning and start actually making a difference.
I used to have my own business, and I loved it. You learn and you make a difference, all at the same time. No one else is doing it for you. There are never enough people that no one gets to be territorial. I really really really miss working for a small company.