Fish

I am thankful for a fish in a depth of the sea, which traveled all the way to a supermarket around the corner, so that I can eat for dinner and make up for my bad day.

Today was another bad day.  Not because of the meetings all day (even during lunch hour), but because, oh gosh, we are stuck again.  And I feel so down for so many other reasons, too.

So I needed some fish.  (And I am not a cat.  And do cats eat a lot of fish in the States?  Perhaps it's just in Japan.)

I feel down because my vacation is over,

because I wasted the best part of my 30s,

because I can't spend all my time reading the huge piles of books in my room,

and because there is nothing in my life that I am looking forward to right now.

But then, pain and hardships are sometimes good for us. 

Yesterday, I was watching Grey's Anatomy. There was an episode with a little girl who cannot feel any physical pain from a genetic disorder.  She keeps getting badly injured, and she could not even feel her stomach bleeding internally to the extent that she needed immediate surgery.  Someone said in the end, "We feel pain for a reason."

And I am also reading a book called "Giver".   It's supposed to be a Young Adult fiction, but the theme is so profound that I wonder whether a young kid really understands.

I am still in the middle of it, but the book seems to be about experiencing pains and developing wisdom.

So, in addition to the fish in the water (subsequently at the supermarket), I am also thankful for a life  that doesn't go so well, so that I can learn.

Post Script:

I wanted to add that, one of my ex-boyfriends used to smile everytime things wouldn't go well.  When I asked him why, he simply said "well, it's a new challenge."  I really loved that about him.

Soup

Today I am thankful for a soup restaurant chain in Japan.  I go eat there quite often when I am too tired to cook but still want something healthy.  They usually have several kinds of soup, plus you can choose bread or rice for a set.

Patience

Today I am thankful and glad about my patience and endurance (at least I have some).  I needed to wind some yarn for my test knitting project, and one of the skeins was all tangled up.  It took me 3 hours to untangle it.  I am all so exhausted.  And I was supposed to go to bed early today.
... I hate Amy (just for the day. Amy is the owner of the Madelinetosh yarn, an indie-becoming-mainstream yarn brand).

Sorry, thus, no picture.

I didn't post anything yesterday, although I did write a post.  It was just not of a public-viewing quality...

Kat (Knitting)

Pattern Name: Kat by Kim Hargreaves

Yarn: Zara Kid, Charcoal, 2.4 skeins

Needles: US 5 (3.75mm) & US 7 (4.5mm)

Details here

I had this hat on my queue for a while, so I am very happy to be able to finally finish it.  Instead of Rowan Kid Classic, I used Zara Kid.  Unlike Kid Classic, the yarn I used had more substance to it, very tightly spun, and the knitted fabric feels much heavier than the original.  So the hat is a little too big for my head.  But it's ok I guess.

I also took a photo of the bolero I finished a while ago.  (My hair color is new!)

Details here, if you are a knitter.

Mom's Cooking

Today I am thankful for my mother's cooking.

I went back home for a day and had dinner with my mom.

We had:

Soup with vegitable, mashroom, and minced fish ball.

Rice cooked with chestnut.

A small side dish with seaweed, raddish sprout, and tiny white fish called shirasu.

Sesami tofu with miso sauce.

Cooked fish with ginger, sweat and salty sause.

Gosh, the photo looks like an old cookbook photo from the 70s...

Friends and Family Weekend

Japanese follows. 日本語は下に

Today I am thankful for everyone around me.

I saw in many emails and on Facebook that this past weekend seemed to have been a "Friend and Family Weekend" in the States. I am not sure if that was ture, but that was exactly what my weekend had been.

On Friday, I met a very good friend of mine whom I haven't seen for about half a year. He is much older than myself, but one of the older friends who I see very regularly. We had both been busy and had gone through a lot individually, so I fell out of touch. It was a great catch-up dinner. (And the food was great, too.)

The restaurant he chose was very coincidendally housed in an old, classical-looking building, which I had been eyeing for my potential restaurant location (in case I should open a restaurant myself... which I don't have any plan so far... but just in case). The 2-story building had been so under-utilized that I was wondering why nobody would buy it and convert it into something fancy. Well, someone had the same idea, obviously. It's just.... now it's pink.

On Saturday afternoon, there was my high school reunion. I am not going to count the years after graduation. Who cares?

I was so reluctant to go, but my best friend literally dragged me to there. Thank you!

My reluctance was derived from two reasons, in afterthought:

(1) My college reunion was so not fun. People had changed so much, and I only saw very snobbish people flashing their gold, or very humble people who were about to fade into the background. I wasn't sure where I belonged.

(2) My self, my identity, my character was so unestablished back in high school. It's almost like, people who knew me back then knew me before I was born. Does that makes sense?

I did not know who I was back then, what I wanted to do, what I liked. The only thing hasn't change was I spoke English back then, I speak English now. People remember me by that, how funny.

(Oh, and there was the third reason... (3) I am not married.)

But I realized my mistake when I went there.

My high school friends, 150 people who came yesterday (out of 450), still feel like my buddies who I grew up with. We all became who we were, fighting, joking, studying, agonizing over ourselves, together.

Out high school was rather special that, due to the education system in Japan, we belonged to the top several percentile in terms of the achievement level, which means we all came from the similar family background. But it's a public school in the suburb so that there was no son and daughter of super-riches. We were all so naive in a good sense, and we all had to study hard to get on with our lives (no family advantage).

My first year classmates used to be especially close. And it still feels to me that they are my brothers and sisters.

... Anyway, after I recuited several single/DINKS girls as my dinner-mates, I went to visit my sister's family.

My baby niece had grown so much since the last time I saw her!

As you can see, it was truly a Friends and Family Weekend for me.

日本語で書くのが面倒になっちゃったのですが。

この週末はわたしの周りの人たち総てに感謝する週末でした。

何故か先週から「Friends and Family Weekend Special」という広告メールを色々な会社から受け取り、アメリカではどうもそんな週末があるらしい、と薄々感じていたところでしたが、今振り返ってみると、まさに私の週末にピッタリのタイトルでした。

金曜日は古い友人とディナー、土曜日は高校の同窓会、そのあと妹の家に泊まりに行って、お喋りいっぱいの週末を過ごしました。

高校の同窓会は本当に面倒だな〜と乗り気ではなかったのですが、親友に無理矢理連れられ、陰のように寄り添って辿り着いたところ、実際はとても楽しかった！大学の同窓会があまりにも詰まらなかったのと、高校当時の記憶が余りなくて実感がなかったのもあったのですが、行ってみたら記憶が蘇ってきました。ああ、一緒に大人になった仲間なんだな〜、と妙に感動してしまいました。

妹の家では妹夫婦とお喋りし、赤ちゃんと遊び、犬と戯れ睡眠を妨害され、でも犬も可愛く、とても楽しかったです。

どうみても日本語が少なくて済みません。。。英語が出来る方はぜひ、詳細は英語の方で。

Aroma

Speaking of aroma, in the time when "aroma-therapy" and various types of herbal essence is so popular, the smell of coffee relaxes me the most.

Today I am thankful that our office is full of wonderful aroma of coffee.

After our team moved down to an executive floor (I'm not an executive, just working for one), there was a coffee machine installed, which is such a privilege in our company.  The company doesn't even provide a water fountain, except for this floor.  So, before, I was reluctant to be working on the floor full of C*Os and their secretaries, but now I am totally happy.

Japanese

Japanese follows. 日本語は下に。

Whenever I have Japanese meals, I am grateful for being a Japanese.

Last Monday, I decided to have quick-fix Japanese food for dinner everyday.  The same menu every day, the menu a normal Japanese person would eat for breakfast.  But I don't have time to fix food in the morning and just have a toast.

The menu is:
White rice + miso soup (instant, but you can't tell the difference anyway) + natto with a bunch of things (the 2nd photo is only a part of them).

Natto is fermented soybeans, a very popular food in Japan.  It's a love-it or hate-it food, often an acquired taste, because of its smell.  I used to dislike it when I was very little.  But it's an ultimate health food.

The other day I watched on news that natto can keep your skin and organs healthy and helps you live longer (they did an experiment on mouse), but you have to eat a pack a day for at least 2 months to see the difference.
So I am thinking, perhaps I should try that too.  So far, I am not at all tired of the same menu.

BTW, my brain-racking work yesterday paid off by my boss's "that's what I was talking about!" Yes, sort of... But I felt totally rewarded so I am very happy today.

和食を食べるときが「日本人で良かった」と思う瞬間。（唯一？）

この間テレビで納豆が身体に良いというのを改めてやっていて、最近体調が安定して好きなものが食べられるようになってきたので、納豆を食べ始めました。朝は時間がないから、夜。納豆に野菜を沢山と卵、すりごま、鰹節、小女子などを入れて、あとはご飯とみそ汁（これはインスタント。。）。あと、大好きなのは胡麻豆腐。
納豆は身体には良いそうですが消化には悪いので、体調を見ながら続けようと思います。毎日でも全然飽きない！

テレビに出ていた大学の先生が「最低２ヶ月くらい食べないと効果が出ない」と言っていたので、ハードルが高いですが、まあ無理せずに気の赴くままやってみよう。

なんで気にするかと言えば、ここ３〜４年体調が悪かったせいで髪の毛などがとても傷んだからです。入院して３ヶ月絶食したときには、その間生えた部分の髪の色が全く抜けてしまっていたので、髪の毛ってスゴく健康状態が出るものだと実感しました。

頑張ろう。

昨日残業して作った提案が上手くいって上司が満足げだったので、今日はわたしも満足げに早々にオフィスを後にしました。たまには頭を振り絞るのもいいものだ。

Commuting

I worked 12 hours today, and I didn't spend time on reading blogs.  So I am truly sincerely thankful that the public transportation in my town is so great.  My trains came in no time and took me home straight away.

My colleagues vacationed in different places, and they all came back with their "subway" experiences.  I am sorry for French people, but the metro in Paris was voted as #1 for "the worst subway experience ever."  (Although I do love to look at it in movies, such as "Paris, je t'aime", the metro episode is my favorite.)

A while ago, there was a documentary on TV, featuring those people in Tokyo Metro companies who maintain subway time-tables/diagrams.  There are professional people who passionately improve the diagrams so that the trains won't be 30 seconds late (or 10 seconds).
We hear announcements on trains like, "we are sorry that this train is a minute late." Which is funny sometimes.
Some people may say that's a waste of time, but I wouldn't mind paying extra for the trains to be always on time.  Subway stations are often air-conditioned, and still the fare is probably cheaper than NYC or London (depending on the exchange rate, but generally).


(((In case you are wondering, the photo is of a subway station.  Some stations have walls/doors between the platforms and the trains, so that people won't fall...)))

Give me a break

Honestly, I am not in a thankful mode today.  A normal person would reward oneself with a booze or a piece of tartlet, or even a good long bath, but I am doing neither to go to bed early (need to get up early tomorrow).

Today I am disappointed by lack of direction and will from my superiors.  I am disappointed that some indispensable colleagues left our company (some time ago, I only found out today).  Just realized today that, I am caught up in a situation where several issues have to be solved all at once in order to make sense.  It's impossible, of course.  Which means, perhaps, our approach has been wrong all along.
Moreover, I am disappointed in myself, for, while I still believe our goal is rightly set, I didn't spend much time arguing about the approach.

So I am thankful that today is almost over, and tomorrow is a whole new day, and I still have got a few new ideas to try.

If you can visualize it in your brain, that means it's achievable.  I can visualize the end-game.  Why do we get stuck so often?

I wish my sister's dogs are with me tonight.

Igo Festival

I am thankful that, on a gorgeous day like today, I had a reason to stay outside all day, enjoying nice breeze and fun big crowd.

As announced a few days ago (in Japanese), a group of young Igo (Go) players in Tokyo, called Igo Amigo, hosted an annual festival at the Roppongi Hills arena.  The group was started by a professional Igo players and amateur Igo freaks several years ago, in the purpose of enlightening young generation with the world of Igo.

Today, I participated as a volunteer.

A professional Igo player teaching a quick introductory workshop

Approx. 4,000 people came to play / watch

Igo is a board game invented in China 4K years ago, but became more popular in Japan afterwards.  Many history figures are known to have played Igo.  It uses black and white marbles, pretty "zen-ish", and has a traditional japanese feeling to it.  The game is much more complex that, unlike Chess, even the strongest computer program still cannot beat experienced non-professional players.

Anyway.

I am also grateful for my colleagues who introduced me to the group, and who teaches me Igo every week.
Thank you so very much.

Inspiration

Today I am thankful for my neighborhood, which is full of inspiration.  I found so many cute knits - poncho, dress, jacket - in this year's style.  I wanted to record everything I saw, especially how they were knitted, but I was too shy.  I love this cape in below picture!

Connections

(Sorry, no Japanese today)

Today's photo has nothing to do with the content. It's just beautiful.

Let's talk about connections. Everyone has myriads of events and things in his life that are all tangled up like a beginner knitting project. But many strands of yarn are weaved together to create a picture, and when you look closely, you start seeing patterns and connections. You see the exact stitch with which things went all wrong. Or, quite the opposite.

I spent an enormous time studying English grammer, pronunciation and conversation before I even knew how to write "airplane" in chinese character. My mom bought me a radio and a textbook of an English program because, at that time, I was very ill and was in a hospital and at home in bed a few months at a time. It was a time when they didn't teach English in elementary schools, so it gave me a huge advantage afterwards. Actually, I spent a lot of time studying and reading.

Being a billingual opened a lot of opportunities to me. When I first got a real job, the company just let me get on the plane and fly all over the world to meet prestegeous architects. And on that plane I met a person who still remains as a good friend. I spent this afternoon chatting with him for hours and it was very truly refreshing.

But I guess I thought about "connections" because I saw this on a platform this morning.

It looked oddly familiar to me, for it resembles something - yes, a landscape plan drawing.

Back in school, my dream was to become a landscape architect who specializes in ecological design and regional planning (meaning planning for a big region, such as a whole Tokyo Met region). Plan drawings are done with a very specific style of a handdrawn font: a slightly-slanted block type. The dotted lines and the letters on the platform brought me back to where I was, 10 years ago.

And this dream, which only led me to my first job, is still floating somewhere up in the open air. I believe I am still holding the other end of the rope, so that one day, if I want, I can pull back the string and will find the connection.


I guess, I am thankful today that I came this far and my life is still great.  I must have done something right to deserve this.

ヒルズで囲碁フェスティバル

というのがありまして、11日午後に六本木ヒルズのアリーナを貸し切って行います。
年に一度、スポンサーに付いてもらって大掛かりにやるそうです。
っといっても、今年初参加なので詳細は分かりませんが、こちら。

囲碁フェスティバル

囲碁は半年前に習い始めた超初心者です。が、無謀にもボランティアで参加することに。
ステージでプロの女流棋士の方々が対局するかたわらをサポートいたします　。

初心者にはプロや有段者のボランティアがゼロから親切に教えてくれますし、おまけも貰えるようです。近くにお立ち寄りの際は是非。

Test Knitting

Japanese follows. 日本語は下に。

Here comes a yarn picture (knew it would come at least once this month, for photographing yarn is the primary usage of my beloved camera).

Today I am thankful and honored that veera (link works for Ravelry member only), my knitter friend from Ravelry, asked me to become her test knitter for her new design, and sent me the pattern.  I am so so very happy!!!!!!!!!!!

Not only I love the design of this particular sweater, I love everything she knits and design.

So above yarn is a candidate for this project.  I have another yarn in a different color, and I haven't decided yet.

(I also went to Adam Lambert concert here in Tokyo tonight, but that will be on another post.)

１ヶ月のあいだ毎日これをやるのであればいつかは毛糸の写真が出るとは思いましたが、こんなに早く。
今日のわたしは「初めてのテストニッター」になれたことに感謝！フィンランド人のデザイナー、veeraさんが最近デザインしたセーターの試し編み隊に選んでくれたのです。
編み図などに間違いがあるかないか確認するための試し編みですが、素敵なパターンがタダでいただけるし、他の人よりいち早く新しいデザインを試せるし、やったー！
と、舞い上がっています。
上の毛糸にするか、他の色にするか、まだ迷い中。

（ちなみに、今日はAdam Lambertのコンサートにも行ってきましたが、それはまた改めて。）

October

Today I am grateful about the beautiful weather we had in Tokyo.  I wanted to take a photo outside, but I had been pretty busy and had no chance during the day.

It's a kind of weather when, long time ago when I was still in highschool, my sister and I took a "voluntary" day-off from school and went on a picnic in a park.  I can't remember what we told the school about our absence ...  It was a beautiful day, and we had so much fun.

It's a little sad that I can no longer do that with my sister.

But still, I am truly grateful that it's October and it's so beautiful.

最近日本語で書くのをサボっていてごめんなさい。海外の人が多く読んでくれているので、なんとなく英語になってしまいます。
１０月のひと月、毎日ひとつずつ、写真に添えて自分が感謝していることを書く、というチャレンジを他の方のブログで見つけました。６日遅れでしたが、昨日から始めることに。

今日の私は１０月の素晴らしい天候に感謝します。

昼間外で写真を撮りたかったのですが、今日に限って忙しく、先日ニューハンプシャーで撮ってきた写真を載せました。

こんな天気で思い出すのは、まだ高校の頃、妹と二人で学校をサボって公園にピクニックに行ったこと。少し肌寒く空は明るく、妙な高揚感があって本当に楽しかった！（学校になんて言ったかは覚えていません。。。）もうそんなことも出来ないのか、と思うと寂しい。

１０月が来たことに、そしてそれが暑い夏のあと、ひときわ美しいことに感謝します。

Grateful

Inspired by new friends, Retta and Shelly, I decided to join this challenge and, each day, post a photo plus comments about a thing I am grateful for.
It was supposed to start from the beginning of October, but "it's better late than never", right?

Today I am actually grateful for 3 things:

First of all, I am grateful about a cafe/deli in the neighborhood of my office.  It's a Japanese style deli, and my most favorite lunch place now.  If you order a lunch with pasta, you will get a bowl of matcha green tea (or coffee).
Second of all, I am grateful about finding this iPhone camera application.  It's so great and so addicting!  I kept taking photos all day today.
Third of all, I am grateful for my new friends.  We touch bases daily, encourage each other, and have fun together.  Retta told me about this camera apps.

Squam Retreat

From the moment signing up for Squam Art Workshops until actually arriving there, I had no idea what I was doing nor where I was going.  I knew nobody except for a person I was sharing a ride from the airport.  I did not know where I would be staying, nor how many people would be there.  But I expected that I was going to experience something great.

Everyone came with some expectation.  And every single person I met at the camp had an experience beyond their imagination.  The 5 days were that wonderful.
People, energy, creativity, crisp cold air, reflections of sunlight on the lake, food, fireplace in the evening, smell of smoke and pine needles, endless chatters, tears, laughter.  Above all, amazing new friends.

The moment my shuttle-mate and I arrived at the site, Elizabeth and Jen and all the other people welcomed us wholeheartedly.  Lily, my shuttle buddy, was truly sweet and took extra care that I settled in cozily.  My cabin mates, Caryn and Shelly, were both so wonderful and we became great friends.

When you grow older and when all your friends got married, and especially if you work for a very conservative financial institution, you don't get enough doze of female companionship.  Come to think of it, for most of my life since highschool, I had been in predominantly masculine environments.  I didn't know until now that being surrounded by all-energetic and creative female souls is that refreshing and can restore your soul.

Our cabin was small, cozy and old.  There were paintings on the wall, jigsaw puzzles, and diaries, left by people who stayed there before us.  I spent one evening reading the diary entries in front of the fireplace.  Because my roommate was from New Hampshire, she brought a whole lot of things from her home, including this beautiful bouquet from her garden.

Most of the cabins are facing the lake.  There is a small pier in front of each cabin.  In the evening, people, one by one, come down to the lakeside, and spent truly relaxing and tranquil time, often with a drink in hand, sharing their life stories in calm voice.

Each one of us had a story or two or a lot more.  I don't talk about them to anyone.  Sometimes I do, but only a small and different bit to each person.  It is strange but here, in the cabins, by the lake, it felt right to talk about ourselves.  Really about "us".  We were allowed to be as self-indulgent as we liked.  It felt just right.  

Apart from the mental restoration, all of us were well-fed (with someone else cooking for us 3 times a day!), better exercised (had to walk 10 min. one way to get to the cafeteria where we can eat), our creativity thoroughly kindled, and we were satisfied by chatting so much from the moment we woke up till the moment we fell asleep.

Many people wrote and said that you cannot explain the Squam experience to anyone who wasn't there.  I fully agree.  So we just have to go back there to talk about it.  Now I am debating myself whether I should attend next June session, or possibly September one to meet my friends again.


On the last note, I was the only one of the 3 Asian-looking people, and I was the one who came the furthest way.  Everyone treated me so kindly.  Thank you, all of you, I enjoyed the every moment of your company.

Taste of Autumn 2

My distant uncle picked some veggies from their field last week, and this pumpkin is one of them.

I don't like American pumpkin, very watery, fiberly, and taste strange (no offense!).  This Asian/Japanese pumpkin is less watery, taste almost like chestnut or sweet potato.  Usually, I simply cook it with deluded milk and some spices until the milk is almost gone.

Most common way to cook pumpkin in Japan is to cook it in a salty/sweet soup (made with dashi, soysauce, suger, and a bit of saki).  Unfortunately, I don't like it that much... the mixture of sweet and salty does not appeal to me.

Chestnut is also my favorite snack in this season.  We used to get a lot from my mom's relatives every fall.  Sometimes my mom cooked them with rice, or make some desert, but most of the time she just boil them.  Afterwards, we cut them in halves and scoop the inside with spoons.

I did not want to buy them at a supermarket, for they were pretty expensive in my neighborhood, but I couldn't resist.  Last week, I saw a lot of chestnuts just falling from trees on the roads everywhere... for free. 

Collage

While strolling around my mother's home town in Kyushu, I went down to an area called "Mameda" district, where in recent years people are making efforts to revive an old shopping strip into a historic tourist spot.

It often astounded me during this trip how everything looks old and rustic in remote areas, including mid-sized cities like Nagasaki.  In Tokyo, especially where I live, there are some old-looking things, but they are usually made to look old.  In my mom's hometown, things are really actually old.